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Older Australians living in aged care facilities are standing up and saying it loud(ish) and proud: they've got sexual needs and they're not afraid to ask that they be met.

As the head of the nursing unit at George's nursing home put it to George's daughter, Heather*: "Just because they're a certain age, they have rights, they have needs."Industry professionals say it is a neglected human rights issue, that older people in aged facilities have for too long been denied the right to express themselves sexually, or have their needs for intimacy fulfilled."I've come across cases whereby residents are in a new relationship, and it's something that is not supported by either the care staff or a family member," says Dr Cindy Jones, a research fellow at the Menzies Health Institute Queensland, at Griffith University, who specialises in ageing and sexuality."They may be separated upon request of family members, and those residents [then] attempt to seek out each other, and some of them seemed unhappy [when they were barred] and then some of them actually passed away shortly after.

Now, of course, I can't say for certain that their death is a result of their being separated, but it seems to have a negative impact." Such separations frequently occur, experts say, because one member of the couple, or both, might have dementia, and aged care facilities and loved ones are often concerned that one or both might not be able to give consent to sexual or intimate acts.

The best solution is of course to meet in person and have a real-life date with someone you’ve met online.When she sees one regular client, a 91-year-old Sydney man with dementia who I'll call George*, "it's understood from the highest point of management down to the nursing team on the floor [what I'm doing]," she says."His primary carer welcomes me when I come in, waits outside, comes back in when I help lift him onto the bed, helps me when I finish with him, and hands me the white envelope with payment.It's a pretty profound thing."As radical as it may sound for such arrangements to take place at an aged care facility — a setting more commonly associated with games of bridge and ukulele recitals — it is just one example from the front lines of the latest sexual revolution sweeping the nation.Just as 20-somethings are fighting to 'Free the Nipple' online, older Australians living in aged care facilities are speaking out about their unmet sexual needs, writes Samantha Selinger-Morris.And a growing number of industry professionals are working to champion their cause.

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